Comparisons are only sometimes negative. Sometimes we do it to motivate ourselves. The problem arises when we use comparisons to form inaccurate opinions about ourselves.
“Oh, she’s married and I’m not. That means I’m not desirable or worthy.”
“She has a great job, and I’m only a cashier. Therefore, I must be lazy and unambitious.”
Thus, begin a toxic cycle of self-doubt and low self-esteem. If you don’t act fast, you’ll start comparing your life to others in unhealthy and destructive ways.
So how do you break this cycle? By building and growing self-love. Self-love means loving yourself for who you are, where you’re at, what you’ve accomplished, and for the person you want to become. It doesn’t mean being perfect or having everything together.
Here are my seven no-BS strategies for building self-love that you can start with today.
1) Look at Yourself Objectively
We all have flaws and imperfections. But if you’re constantly looking for them, they’ll make you forget yourself. So instead, think about your strength and skill. But don’t lie, either. For example, admit it if you need to improve certain aspects of your life.
2) Start Practicing and Living in Gratitude
Write about what you are grateful for each day in your gratitude journal. This simple gratitude experiment can boost positive thinking even during difficult times.
3) Use Your Past Self as a Benchmark to Compare Yourself With
It doesn’t matter if your friend gets married before you or your colleague gets a promotion before you do. Think about what you can do today to better yourself tomorrow. That’s the only thing you should be concerned about.
4) Permit Yourself to Make Mistakes
Mistakes are part of life. Please don’t beat yourself up over them. Instead, use them as opportunities to challenge your creative energy.
5) Be Aware of Your Triggers
Mental health matters. Pay attention the next time the self-loathing starts creeping inside you.
Is there something happening around you that triggers these feelings? Maybe you have a toxic person in your life. Whatever it is, please take note of it. Then ask yourself what you could do differently to avoid those situations.
6) Stop Looking for Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Be Happy
Accept it: you are a good person. You deserve happiness. There are no reasons why you shouldn’t have all the good things life can offer. So go ahead and chase your happiness.
7) Do One Thing That Boost Your Confidence Every Day
Perhaps you have words of body-positive affirmations taped on your mirror. Or you play a video of an inspiring Ted Talk. Whatever works for you, just do one thing every day that can lift your confidence and help you refocus.
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Trust me. Once you reach your full potential, you will no longer see yourself as less than others. Instead, you will finally know true self-worth.
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